this is not pitchfork

Another CD skeleton in my closet (see, Vanilla Ice). This happens to the best of us; music winds up in our collection and we have no recollection of ever purchasing it. I even checked the CD to see if it said “promo copy” on it, hoping that it was given to me for free and that would be my excuse. But no, I have no idea why I have this. I was an adult when this album came out, I can’t even blame it on the follies of youth. Maybe I can blame my ex. But I have promised to review every album I own, and here this is, staring me in the face like 70 minutes of pure guilt.

What I know about the Insane Clown Posse is their fans are called juggalos, which makes me think of, I don’t know, thugs dressed in clown outfits juggling cans of Faygo. I know (after extensive research) that they believe in MMFCL- Much motha fuckin clown love and, well, I’m not down with the clown love. I know they have conventions and they wear makeup that makes them look like a cross between some WWF wrestler and Tammy Faye Baker. And they bring their kids to these conventions – I know this because I once saw a clip of a two year old singing Fuck the World – and you may think that couples who name their babies Adolph and live in white supremacist enclaves are what’s wrong with the world, but after researching juggalos, I beg to differ.

But here it is. Here is this CD in my collection, shelved right between KISS Alive and Slipknot’s first album and I wonder if maybe I don’t have some deep seated fetish for rock bands dressed in makeup and masks, which has some underlying meaning in regards to my fear of clowns.

Oh, wait. See, there is a reason I have this. It’s the guest appearance by Ol Dirty Bastard on Bitches. Another mystery of my music collection solved. ODB makes everything ok.